Fat girl fit

I have a dream.

I dream of getting my body back. (Disclaimer: "Back" being the operative word. I've never been super skinny like some people - I'm just not built that way - but I've certainly been a lot fitter than I am now.)

Now that I'm not pregnant and S is sort of settling into a sleep routine, I feel ready to focus on getting fit. Having two girls close together has certainly taken its toll on my body shape. As has chocolate.

Mmmmm. All worth it I think. But now change is a-stirring.

For the last few months I've been visualising myself running fast and powerfully down the streets of Island Bay to the beach.

Last Thursday I actually managed to get out and do it. The stars aligned for me: It was a beautiful sunny day, both girls were sleeping and Paul was home sick so could supervise them. (Sorry Paul that your illness was part of my stars aligning!)

I didn't think about it. I just squeeeeezed into a sports bra (boy, underwire feels weird after months of soft pregnancy/maternity bras), donned trackies/t-shirt/cap, laced up my trainers and set off into the bright afternoon.

And it felt good! I thought I would be all unstable and wobbly, but I felt fine.

The months of visualisation must have tricked my body into thinking I'm a runner. Also, I didn't repeat past mistakes of slogging it out at one speed. I interval trained, varying between a walk, a slow jog, a fast jog and a sprint. It kept things interesting and meant I could slow down to a walk when my lungs were screaming.

Later that afternoon I paid for it though, when my atrophied muscles realised the trick. I felt old and crippled.

By the next day I was all mended, and on Saturday I got another chance to run down to the beach. Actually, that felt harder than the first run. I guess my muscles were still reeling after all.

My plan is to run when I can - except for in the morning. Getting up is painful enough as it is; I don't want to try and get up even earlier to fit a run in. It would make me dread running, and I want this to be a fun experience.

I'm also not going to "diet". My reasons for not dieting still stand.

Here is an inspiration photo of past Emma - to show you the look I'm hoping to achieve. This photo was taken a month before I started dating Paul:

Still curvy, but more comfortable in my own skin. (And I'll ditch the pout, I promise!)

Thanks for your comments.


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